Poly Friendly Therapists
San Francisco Bay Area
Dr. Sand Chang, Oakland, 510-545-2321, sandchang.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
Orit Weksler, MFT, Berkeley, 510-356-2783 oritwekslermft.com or email@example.com
Alexandra Korunskaya, LCSW, SF and Berkeley, (415)672-0185, alex.niftybox.com, or firstname.lastname@example.org
Claire Jeannette, MFT, Berkeley, (5110)843-6971, clairejeannettemft.com or email@example.com
Jana Schustack, MFT, Berkeley, (510)594-4044, www.anamcaratherapycenter.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
Dr. Mary Bradford,Kensington, (510)843-5508 www.marybradfordphd.com or email@example.com
Dr. Meg Stein, San Francisco, (415)237-1703 www.drmegstein.com
Kate Engelberg, MFT, Berkeley, (510)516-1524, www.kathleenengelberg.wordpress.com
Christy Calame, LCSW, Oakland, 510-628-0877, firstname.lastname@example.org, www.zoho.comDr. Akhila Kolesar
, San Francisco, (415)480-4930. stillpointSF.org
, LCSW, San Francisco, (415)318-9584, goldengatecounseling.com
MFT and Jeanne Courtney
MFT, El Cerrito and San Francisco offices,
, LCSW, San Francisco, www.cristaunderwoodlcsw.com
Ron Fox, Ph'd, Berkeley, (510)423-0645, email@example.com, www.ronfoxphd.com
Grant Gordin, MFTI, Berkeley, (714)914-9865, www.grantgordin.com
Aaron J. Feldman, LMFT (888)626-1514 (Offices in Walnut Creek & Berkeley) firstname.lastname@example.org; www.formingrelationships.com
Ivy Tiegel, MFTI, San Francisco, (415)787-5489 http://therapywithivy.com/
Out of Area
Karin E. Wandrei, PhD, LCSW, Rohnert Park, CA, 707-304-4245, email@example.com or www.karinwandrei.com
Mandy Traut, MA, LMHC, Lynnwood, Washington (Seattle area), 425-224-6234, firstname.lastname@example.org, www.newconnectionscounseling.com
Elizabeth Lipman-Stern, LCSW, New Jersey, Outside the Box Counseling
Alison Kilkelly, Psychotherapist,Madison, Wicsonsin, 608.567.4648 Email: AKCounselingMadison@gmail.com, www.AKCounselingMadison.com
The two links above are to two very helpful articles on polyamory for mental
health clinicians. Useful for a therapist who needs some educating.
resources: Coaching, workshops, and classes for open relationships:
Loving More (national conferences,
workshops, etc), www.lovemore.com or (303)-543-7540
World Polyamory Association, www.worldpolyamoryassociation.org,
or (808) 244-4103
Wendy-O Matik (workshops, classes, and
Reid Mihalko (classes and events), wwwReidAboutSex.com
Cunning Minx' weekly poly podcasts, at www.polyweekly.com, see especially
“Crowdsourcing Jealousy” podcast.
Marcia Baczynski (workshops, ebooks,
Pepper Mint and Jen Day,
(workshops, parties, social events), www.freaksexual.com or email@example.com
OpenSF Conference, www.open-sf.org
Dawn Davidson (personal and relationship coaching, workshops and events) www.loveoutsidethebox.com
Francesca Gentille (workshops and
Terry Brussel (hypnosis audio downloads
on jealousy, trainings and classes), www.acesuccess.com,
Cat Maness, MFT, (510)859-3880, www.catmaness.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
Karen Haas, MA, Counselor and couples coaching, (707)494-2205, Sonoma County, CA.
To find a therapist
or couples’ counselor with expertise on open relationships:
The Poly-Friendly Professionals Directory: www.polychromatic.com/pfp
Kink-Aware Professionals Network: www.kinkawareprofessionals.org
Loving More is an
organization that publishes a magazine, holds annual conferences, and provides
information and inspiration for people of all orientations who are interested
in exploring healthy relationship options including group marriage, open
couples, intimate networks, expanded families, and intentional community.
This is the website for
the list alt.polyamory. It has links to many other poly sites, and to over
a dozen poly-related discussion lists.
Alternatives to Marriage Project
On the menu on the left side of the home
page, scroll down to the section on “Ways to be Unmarried,” and click on
Polyamory in that section. There is a list of websites and books about
polyamory, and a brief review of Love in Abundance.
Open Fidelity is a website
and blog about non-monogamous relationships. The creator, Ann Sharman, writes
various articles about the subject and how to remain faithful while
This blog tracks coverage
of polyamory in the mainstream and not-so-mainstream media. Alan, the
blogger, provides much commentary, frequent updates, and a rich archive.
Polyamory? What, like, two
Great poly relationship
advice for both beginners and the advanced. Widely recommended.
Tristan Taormino's Opening Up
Opening Up is a website
that educates people interested in open relationships of all kinds and provides
a list of professionals (psychologists, social workers, etc.) who are
knowledgeable about alternative relationships.
Expansive Loving is an
internationally serving on-line group for those wishing to explore polyamory
from a spiritual, "sex-positive," and/or personal growth perspective.
It also serves those interested in supporting and exploring unconventional
relationship dynamics. Expansive Loving has a companion group by the same name
Legal and Financial Issues
Whether you're living with
one partner or many, whether your partnership is same-sex or different-sex, one
day you'll have questions. We help you find answers.
Cat and Dragon/Open
This link is to an article called “Models of Open Relationships” by Kathy
Labriola, poly-friendly counselor.
Cat and Dragon/jealousy
This link is to one of Stef's favorite articles about jealousy, “Managing
Jealousy in Open Relationships” by Kathy Labriola.
Radical Love workshops
taught by Wendy-O-Matik, author of "Redefining our Relationships: Guidelines for Responsible
Institute for 21st Century Relationships
Anita Wagner, (703)561-8136, conferences, classes, educational
, or email@example.com
(Hernedon Virginia, Washington, DC area)
Polyinfo.org a clearinghouse for information on open relationships www.polyinfo.org
slutphd.com/2014/03/19/251/ This is a great website with articles about different aspects of open relationships, sexuality, and related issues,
all written by Dr. Slut, Ph'd, whose motto is "That's Dr. Slut to you!"
Line-family.info Website highlights their book, “Creating a Line Family” a much-needed and useful addition to the poly literature, and I would encourage poly people to order it
by going to their website: or contact them at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Abundance: A Counselor's Advice on Open Relationships, by Kathy
A guide for couples, individuals, and families that are either
already involved in a polyamorous relationship or who are considering this type
Marriage: A New Lifestyle for Couples,
by Nena and George O'Neill.
A contemporary classic that tackles the topics:
open vs. closed marriages, jealousy, love, sex, and more!
Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities, by Dossie Easton and
A how-to guide about negotiating honest non-monogamy,
non-traditional relationships, and non-traditional sex.
Roadmaps for the Clueless and Hopeful, by Anthony Ravenscroft.
A straight-forward, basic
yet intricate introduction to polyamory. The author is very thorough and
impartial, addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of living a poly
Polyfidelity: How to Keep NonMonogamy Safe, Sane, Honest & Laughing, You
Rogue, by Celeste
This was the first book (now there's another one) about honest
non-monogamy written specifically for lesbians.
More: The Polyfidelity Primer, by Ryam Nearing.
Written by one of the
founders of Loving More, this how to manual and reference book is for those who
wish to move beyond monogamy in a responsible, ethical, and loving way.
by Adam Phillips. Phillips' book, a collection of short meditations about
the concept of monogamy, raises more questions than it answers -- but we think
that's his point.
Polyamory Handbook: A User's Guide,
by Peter J. Benson. A book that helps clarify what polyamory is and
how to engage in healthy polyamorous relationships. The handbook is a great
primer for those who are not as familiar with the subject.
Polyamory the New Love Without Limits, by
Dr. Deborah Anapol (1997). This introduction to polyamory includes
sections on ethics, how to tell if polyamory is right for you, skills for
successfully managing polyamorous relationships, jealousy, and managing the
transition from monogamy to non-monogamy.
Polyamory in the Twenty-First Century: Love and Intimacy with Multiple Partners, by
Dr. Deborah Anapol
Do you have Polyamory books, links, or other resources you'd recommend?
Let us know so we can add them to this collection!
Magazine and Academic Journal Articles on Open Relationships
Aviram, Hadar. (2008). Make Love, Not Law: Perceptions of the Marriage Equality Struggle Among Polyamorous Activists, Journal of Bisexuality, 7, 261 - 287.
Barker, Meg, Heckert, J., and Wilkinson, E. (2013) “From One Love to Many Loves and Back Again”. Intimacies: Relations, Exchanges, Affects. Basingstoke: Palgrave Macmillan. 148-160.
Barker, M. and Langdridge, D. (2010). “Whatever happened to Non-monogamies?” Critical Reflections on Recent Research and Theory. Sexualities, 13(6), 748-772.
Barker, Meg and Ritchie A. (2007). “Hot Bi Babes and Feminist Families: Polyamorous Women Speak Out”. Lesbian & Gay Psychology Review, 8(2), 141–151.
Barker, Meg. (2004). “This is My Partner, and This is My Partner’s Partner: Constructing a Polyamorous Identity in a Monogamous World”. Journal of Constructivist Psychology 18: 75 – 88.
Emens, Elizabeth F. (2004). “Monogamy’s Law: Compulsory Monogamy and Polyamorous Existence”. New York University Review of Law and Social Change. (29).
George, Robert P. (2006). “Gay Marriage, Democracy, and the Courts”. The Wall Street Journal. U.S.http://online.wsj.com/news/articles. Accessed on 5February, 2014.
Haritaworn, J., Lin, C.J., and Klesse, C. (2006) “Poly/Logue. A Critical Introduction to Polyamory” Sexualities, 9 (5), 515-529.
Klesse, Christian. (2006) “Polyamory and its ‘Others’: Contesting the Terms of Non-monogamy”, Sexualities, 9 (5), 565-583.
Klesse, Christian. (2014) “Polyamory: Intimate Practice, Identity, or Sexual Orientation?” Sexualities, 17 (1/2) 81-99.
Lesher, Elizabeth C. (2013) “Protecting Poly: Applying the Fourteenth Amendment to the Nonmonogamous”. Tulane Journal of Law & Sexuality, 22. 127-145.
Oppenheimer, Mark. (2011). “Married, With Infidelities”, The New York Times. Retrieved 3 February, 2014 from //www.nytimes.com/2011/07/03/magazine/infidelity-will-keep-us-together.html
Ritchie, A. and Barker, M. (2006). “‘There Aren't Words For What We Do Or How We Feel So We Have To Make Them Up’: Constructing Polyamorous Languages in a Culture of Compulsory Monogamy”. Sexualities, 9(5), 584–601.
Rule, Doug. (2013). “Savage Intent” Metro Weekly. Retrieved 5 February, 2014 from http://www.metroweekly.com/feature/?ak=8625.
Shannon, Deric and Willis, Abbey. (2010). “Theoretical Polyamory: Some Thoughts on Loving, Thinking, and Queering Anarchism”. Sexualities, 13(4) 433 – 443.
Sheff, Elisabeth. (2011). “Polyamorous Families, Same-Sex Marriage, and the Slippery Slope”. Journal of Ethnography, 40 (5): 487 – 520.
Stryker, Susan (2008). “Transgender History, Homonormativity, and Disciplinarity”. Radical History Review, 100, 145-157.
The Polyamory Society. http://www.polyamorysociety.org. Accessed on 5 March, 2014.
Weitzman, Geri, Davidson, J., and Phillips, R.A. (2012) “What Psychology Professionals Should Know About Polyamory”. Baltimore: National Coalition for Sexual Freedom.
Wilkinson, Eleanor. (2010) “Equalize Love! Intimate Citizenship Beyond Marriage” GEXcel Work in Progress Report (5): Proceedings from
GEXcel Theme 10: Love in Our Time – a Question for Feminism. Tema Genus Report Series.
http://www.uncharted-worlds.org/bi/ I have found “Jennifer’s Bisexuality Resource Page” to be one of the most
comprehensive resource sites on bisexuality.
http://www.bisexual.org The Bixexual Foundation is non-profit. The site offers casual resources for
bisexuals including online personal ads,; chat
rooms, contests, and notices of conferences and events.
http://bisocialnetwork.com This organization works to stop bi-phobia/bi-invisibility.
Transgender and Transsexual
http://transparentcy.org Transparentcy gives support and resource to trans-sexual parents and their
children and has a link for transsexual young people.
These two sites have a lot of good information of many sorts.
http://www.shewasthemanofmydreams.com “A gender journey with my past husband and my present wife” is how Diane
Daniels subtitles her site. A wonderful resource and heartwarming true
telling of their transition journey.
http://www.tes.org/ TES (The Eulenspiegel Society) is one of the world’s oldest and largest
social and educational organizations for BDSM, located in New
York. The site includes many links to other organizations.
http://ranai.wordpress.com/ This is an international, multilingual comprehensive resource.
http://www.fetlife.com This is a social networking site for the BDSM and Fetish communities.
http://lovethatworks.org/ The Institute for Twenty-First Century Relationships along with its political
arm,the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom, exist to support the
freedom of consenting adults to discover intimate relationship structures which
best fulfill their needs and potentials. This site provides details of upcoming
events and links to books on topics such as
polyamory, polygamy, swinging, power-based
relationships, bisexuality, trans-gender issues and more.
http://worldpolicy.org/globalrights/sexorient/sexorient.htm The World Policy Institute’s Project for Global Democracy and Human Rights
provides the first comprehensive country-by-country report on rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and
transgendered persons in the Americas.
http://www.ncsfreedom.org/ The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is a nationwide advocacy coalition
whose purposes include educating law enforcement,health care and psychiatric
professionals as well as a media advocacy and training to expand the
world’s concept of normal, acceptable sexual practices among
www.intimateartscenter.com Sheri Winston, CNM,RN,BSN,LMT, is a treasure
trove of knowledge about sexuality.